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Basically gonna explain my life (I’m Mexican, I learned English as my second. Dont judge) I was born. From what I remember the first house my parents fought. Drank. And hit me sometimes. I was very young about 5. A lot of trauma of drinking and fighting and abuse. Little after that I was probably 6-7 and my own family from my mom’s daughters kids offered me drugs but I was young and had no clue what it was. Then They sexually assaulted me. Mind you these were 3 different people. 2 cousins and a brother. Those 3 people sexually assaulted me multiple times on different occasions. Apart from that my brother abused me also. Hit me and bullied me around the house when my mom worked. Another thing. My mom is good. I guess my dad hurt her. She’s a better mom now. Basically my whole childhood I got raped and drugged and abused physically. Then I got enrolled en school and had to deal with the American racist bullying me and just ignorant earth stuff that I don’t understand. Basically my whole life I just got abused. Literally. Any good times I remember was from school field trips. And now I’m currently 16 with a heart problem and I’m sure I’m gonna die. But I just wanna know if your God is real why did this happen to me. I’m strong and haven’t committed cause of my mom only. IDC about this world or people in it. It’s very cruel. I hate it here. I just wanna know why. Why me and why. Just why. Please why
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This is so that you may obtain mercy and love before God. Try praying and asking for the tears that will allow you to love even your enemies. And if the opportunity arises and grace is given, this is a place where you can be with others who have also been wounded while living their lives… a place where your wounds of the heart and your burdens can be healed and restored. But it pains us deeply that we cannot lead you here, as you are still too young (a minor).
If you were at an age where you could make your own decisions and take responsibility for your life, we would be able to guide you to this place so that grace could be poured out to heal your illness of the hearts and your wounds—but it is truly heartbreaking.
Please endure well, and come to this place where your wounds, your pain, and your tears can be healed. This is a place where those who are hurt, suffering, and broken in tears come to find healing.
For now, please visit this site and take some time to read more deeply and thoroughly through the writings there.
Instead of resentment, pray for a heart that can show mercy to them. Instead of hatred, pray for tears that can love. You must come out of this resentment—out of this hellish hatred—if you are to live a normal life. If not… your heart will become buried in resentment, your chest will burn with bitterness, and you’ll lose all reason to live in the fire of anger and hatred. If you do not wish to live your entire life in resentment, tears, sorrow, and pain, then pray to God with all your life, asking Him for the tears to forgive them—and through that, receive love. That is the only way for you to live a normal life.. It is so painful and heartbreaking.
Please, cry out and plead before God to give you the tears to love them. When the tears that enable you to love them come into your heart, all wounds and pain will be healed by the love of Christ. Cry out to God, saying, ‘I have no tears to love even my enemies… Please give me the tears to love them.’ This is the beautiful prayer of Christ and the grace by which one comes to know God. Whoever does not know love does not know God. A Christian who denies the love of Christ is merely a religious person—not a true follower of Christ..
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